Wet or Dry?

My first-born asked if there was anything he could do for me to be able to play the playstation and I said, "Of course!" I told him if he washed, dried, folded, and put away all the clothes, he could play. I knew it would take him all day and he would be distracted, yet he was very attentive to his loads and followed through to the end. Well, it was time for my shower last night and my little wash man had taken all the used towels and washcloths out of the bathroom and washed them. My goodness, he's good! I had to go to the hall closet to get one and what do I see? Towels and washcloths folded neatly and put away. I picked one up and guess what? IT WAS WET!! I touched a few more to make sure the one I chose was the only wet one and I was wrong. Every towel and wash cloth he put away was wet!! Not dripping wet, yet wet enough for him to KNOW they weren't ready to come out of the dryer! Sigh....I stood their holding the wet cloth wondering what I should do. Do I go off on him or do I give him a chance to explain himself? Do I wake him up at midnight and make him wash them all over again or do I let him sleep and snatch him up before dawn in the morning? Well, it's morning and I allowed him to sleep. The wet towels are on the sofa awaiting his presence, so he can wash them over and do the job correctly. I know exactly what happened. It was getting close to his bedtime and he couldn't wait to play the playstation, so he went ahead and put his last load away wet. Because I slept on my anger, I'm not as angry, yet disappointed - very disappointed. I'll be calm and show mercy, yet he will pay! Will he tell the truth or dare he lie to me about what happened? Will he tell me the clothes felt dry or will he admit his strong desire to satisfy his need to play the playstation? Well, I can hardly wait to hear what my preteen has to say. Is this the beginning of things to come? Whatever it is, I'm taking it as a reminder to stay at the feet of Jesus and PRAY!

It Happened

People said it would happen and I'm actually experiencing it. My first-born grew up. I'm sick to my stomach. He'll be 13 this year - a teenager. My baby is gone. I noticed his voice is changing. His attitude is more mature, yet still stinks at times. His concerns are greater. He's a big boy now and it really does seem like it happened overnight! Sigh...you really don't realize how short life is until you watch a child grow up. Wait a minute! Did I say teenager? Oh my goodness, I'm going to be the Mother of a teenager!! His birthday isn't until November, so I still have a few months to mentally prepare myself. It happened...it really happened.

Close The Gate!

Sometimes I wonder why simple matters around my home turn into major issues that only I seem to care about. For instance, when I wash dishes, which is quite frequently, I can see the gate leading to our backyard, through the kitchen window. The boys have made a habit of leaving this gate open – not just unlocked, but wide open. In spite of my teaching on family protection and safety, they insist on offering an open invitation to everyone to enter our backyard – party over here! I tried to find a clever way to express to my sons the importance of closing the gate, yet instead another Life Lesson for LaVender was in order. Yes, closing and locking the gate is important, yet there are other gates requiring my immediate attention. My temple also has gates needing to be protected from outside influences. My ear gates, eye gates, and especially the gate to my heart should be guarded at all times. These gates need to be closed to influences harmful to my family and to me. Who and what I choose to allow within my personal gates can affect my home environment. My needs, desires, and passions can also be swayed by who and what enters my gates, therefore, they must be safeguarded. The television, telephone, radio, Internet, books, and the company I keep have subtle ways to enter my gates and obscure my focus as a woman, wife, and Mother. We have a high calling and we must be protected and guarded, so close the gate!

Marriage is an Adventure!

I spoke with an older woman yesterday who shared she lost her husband in November. She was 79 years old and cute as a button. I asked her what she missed most about him after being married for over 30 years and companionship was her answer. "He was my best friend," she said. She had a huge smile on her face and there was no doubt her husband was truly her best friend. I couldn't imagine what she felt, yet I was happy she felt comfortable sharing with me. Of course I began to think of my best friend, my husband. I told her marriage was a job which required overtime. She agreed and also said, "Marriage is an adventure!' I've never heard it explained this way, yet I guess it is when you think about it. As she began to walk away, she told me to call my husband anything you want, yet also tell him you love him in the same sentence. I looked the word adventure up in the dictionary.
Adventure - A bold undertaking in which risks are to be run and chances taken. An unusual experience.
Yep! Marriage is an adventure!

I Can Walk!

I recently conversed with a Mother who hasn't walked in 15 years. She posed a question something like this...What would you do for the first time if you had not walked in fifteen years? Well, I don't know for sure what I would do, but I would hope I'd go somewhere to be alone and drop to my knees and thank God for the use of my legs. Then I'd probably jump and shout for joy as I walked myself to the bathroom to use it after getting myself so excited.

Last night, the family was together in my sons' room and as the oldest played his keyboard, Mama was putting on a show dancing up a storm. What a joy it is to have the activity of our limbs. My goodness, sometimes we don't think about it until we're reminded of how blessed we are. Some Mothers are not able to do simple tasks that I sometimes find myself complaining about. Some Mothers don't have custody of their children and yes, I get TIRED of mine from time to time. Some Mothers don't have good health and have to solicit help to care for their children. Yes, it's a whole world out there we're not aware of. It's a wonderful thing to know God will love us enough to use people and events to remind us of how grateful we should be.

The Good Ole Days

My car is out of commission and it feels good to not be able to go anywhere. We use to be a one car family for a couple of years and this is just a reminder of 'the good ole days.' I had to take my husband to work yesterday because a few things HAD to get done, yet today I'm locked inside. Am I getting lazy or do I truly enjoy the domestic blood running through my veins? Whatever it is, I'm enjoying it. I always told my husband that I wanted to stay home, be barefoot in the kitchen, and bake bread from scratch. Notice I didn't say pregnant (smile). I love the peaceful home environment and making my home a fun, loving dwelling place for my family. I love having dinner prepared when my husband comes home and the family eating dinner together. I love the smell of fresh baked brownies for my sons to share with their friends standing at the door panting. I love quiet evenings with candles burning and my favorite smell of liquid potpourri flowing through the house. Sooo nice and relaxing. Well, tomorrow may be a different story since my husband thinks the car will be back on the road and I'll be ripping and running like a mad momma on the highway again! Either way, I'm grateful for my family life and everyday is a 'good ole day.' These periodic moments when nothing is going on only prepares me for the busyness about to begin! On your mark, get ready, set, gooooo!

A Friend In Need

I fell asleep on the sofa last night while waiting for laundry to dry. At 11 p.m., I awoke, checked on the laundry, and peeked in my sons' room. My nine year old was in bed watching television which baffled me because he is usually the more obedient of my two seeds. I looked at him puzzled and asked why he had the television on and he said, “I don’t know.” Hmmm…I was waaay too tired to discipline in love, so I angrily told him to turn it off and go to sleep. I walked away and he began to cry saying he didn’t like sleeping alone – his older brother was at a sleepover. This only irritated my tired mind and body more because I was looking forward to getting in my own bed, yet there was a possibility I'd be sleeping in his dirty room. I again told him to go to sleep and I left to take a shower. I hesitated taking a shower because it’s my place of confession and conviction. Sure enough, while enjoying my hot shower, I was reminded of a discussion in Church School yesterday. We discussed whether we would help a friend in need no matter what the time or need was. Well, in class, I boldly said I would willingly help, yet here I was too selfish and tired to help my own child inside my own home. Good grief! Okay, so I finished my shower and grabbed my pillow with intentions of sleeping with my son, yet when I walked into his room, he was peacefully sleeping. I’m sure I’ll have many opportunities to help him and show compassion, yet I missed this one. I learned a valuable lesson also – don’t be so quick to say what I would do because actions are more valuable than words. Sometimes we are placed in situations to show us if our heart is in the right place. Are you ready to help a friend or neighbor in need? How about a family member? The opportunity to help may be before us today!

Luke 11:5-7 (NIV)

Then he said to them, "Suppose one of you has a friend, and he goes to him at midnight and says, 'Friend, lend me three loaves of bread, because a friend of mine on a journey has come to me, and I have nothing to set before him.' "Then the one inside answers, 'Don't bother me. The door is already locked, and my children are with me in bed. I can't get up and give you anything.'

What Happened?

I'm taking a four-week Cake Decorating class and last night I was not prepared. It was my second class and I had done no homework, my cake wasn't frosted and I left my book at home. I was thankful that the instructor was the only one in the room when I arrived, so I could apologize for not being a "good student." I told her I once was an organized person, yet didn't know what happened to me. Her reply was, "Oh, you're fine. You're just a working woman." Is that what it is? Yuck! When the other girls (much younger than I) came in, they were prepared and had everything they needed for class. I watched them place their frosted cakes and supplies on the table. I wondered if they had children, so I asked. Out of the three, only one did, which allowed me to exhale. I privately laughed at myself and the crazy, rushed day I was having that wasn't finished yet. The class went very well and I truly enjoyed it. So, is this my life as a working woman or are my time management and organization skills slipping because I'm turning into an OLDER woman? Either way, I'm glad it's Friday!

Strangers In My Home

I walked in the house last night and found my husband and sons playing dominoes. Mondays and Wednesdays are no TV/Playstation nights for the boys, so they are forced to do other things. I often wonder how much more family time we would have if that darn television wasn't in the house. When the television is on, it's like we've invited strangers into the home and all they do is talk, talk, talk, talk, talk! Hmmm...who invited these strangers in our home anyway? AUUUUUGH! TURN THE TV OFF!!!

I am so thankful for Mondays and Wednesdays and I wish I could get my husband to agree to more nights in the week like this. Well, I know I'm pushing it, so I'll just be thankful for what's going on now.


I had the pleasure of being reconnected with a neighbor after five years. She had such a powerful testimony of a spiritual battle she's been enduring. You know, just when you think you've gone through something, God will show you how our trials are LIGHT AFFLICTIONS. I thank God for knowing just how much we can bear, although I sometimes wonder if my scale is tipping. The pleasure in being reconnected with this neighbor was how she boldly shared her story with me without pride, embarrassment, or fear of being judged. That was a testimony within itself! Once again - it's not about us! Someone needs to hear our story in order to strengthen others and bring God glory!

Raising Mothers E-Newsletter

The latest edition of MW Raising Mothers is now available for viewing! When time permits, take a minute to read some encouraging words from Mothers from across the states! Have a joyful day in Motherhood!


The Challenge

Tennis backboards are great for training and exercise; yet I found out Sunday, while practicing my swings, that there is no challenge to chase or return balls when you’re alone. I had to continually motivate myself to stay one more minute and hit one more ball. Challenging myself in the game of tennis led me to weigh whether or not my life was being challenged. Have I progressed since last year or the year before? Is my walk more effective? Am I dealing with the same dead issues I dealt with in previous years? Have I passed relationship tests with friends and family or am I still in remedial classes waiting to graduate from the school of love and forgiveness? Is my social circle enclosed with encouragers or am I stuck in the slow lane with grumblers, mumblers, and complainers? It’s easy to become stagnant in life if we aren't challenged to do better. I want to always strive for excellence and have a passion for life. I want to be surrounded by women who aren’t afraid to challenge my signs of complacent mothering. I want to be surrounded by wives who will admonish me to always show love to my husband. I want to be surrounded by believers who will challenge a complacent spiritual walk. I want to be an example to my children to live boldly, with passion, and in faith. I’m up for the challenge and it’s time to shake the dust from my feet of all things and people hindering me from moving forward in Christ. Are you up for the challenge? I thank God for MOMSWEB and the many women who challenge and encourage me as I strive to be a Titus II Woman. This week, our latest Raising Mothers E-Newsletter will be available online for viewing and several Mothers have submitted challenging words as we plunge into another year as women, wives, and mothers. I'll be sure to challenge you to read their encouraging words with an email notice to inform you when our newsletter is aired!

Philippians 3:13-14 (NKJV)

Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

Love Conquers All Part II

It's only fair to follow-up on my previous post about my twelve year old. God knows I don't want anyone thinking I can't stand my own child (smile). The last couple of days have been great and I'm doing all I can to decrease, so God can increase within me. I see my baby boy as I did when he was first born - he still has his little baby face and is as sweet as pie. What changed? He grew up and developed his own mind and opinions. Darn! I've been led to pour into my first-born in an unusual way. He has been given the title of Character Trainer for our family. Each week he must learn a different character trait and find creative ways to teach the family so we can implement it in our daily life. He feels so important and even asked for my help. Bless his heart. Whatever ways this is helping ME, I accept it and I know he is benefiting from it also as well as the entire family. Yes, my clone is still a clown and irritating as heck at times, yet he's mine and I'm probably just as irritating to him at times also. We are what we are! Thank God for Jesus!!

Love Conquers All

My twelve year old is so much like me I can hardly stand it. Sometimes he irritates me so much, I have to bite my tongue to keep from saying something harsh. I was convicted this morning as I had my quiet time with the Lord. I need to show my first-born more love and give him more attention. This is a crucial age and stage of life for him and I definitely don't want to mess things up. I hear teenage years are difficult enough, so I sure don't want to add to the problem. There is nothing more powerful and more influential than a Mother's love and he needs me. Lord, hide me from myself and help me to show your love, your patience, your compassion, your long-suffering, and the love my son needs - not the love I feel like giving.

We Are Healed!

With the unpredictable weather we’ve been having, my family has definitely endured our share of aches, pains, and viruses. Saturday morning, my youngest awoke crying with an earache, which meant another trip to the hospital. While the doctor was contemplating whether to prescribe antibiotics or not, I asked him what his hesitation was. He said whatever is going on in my son’s ear would take its natural course and heal itself, yet the antibiotics would help the process. This is so true; our body is a miracle and God created it to heal itself. I recently put this to the test when an unwelcome virus decided to visit my body. I decided to attack it with natural home remedies. It took longer for my health to be restored, yet it happened. Whether we take medicine or not, it is the blood of Jesus that heals and restores our health. It is God’s amazing grace and mercy that keeps us in our right minds and good health. As my son swallows his daily antibiotic, I remind him to thank God for His healing power and for blessing doctors with wisdom and knowledge to treat sickness and pain – God gets all the glory!

Many of us have made commitments to develop healthier lifestyles. I encourage you to continue with your commitment as I continue to exercise and eat healthy to control my blood pressure. Yes, it requires hard work and discipline, yet I remind myself to do my part, so God can do His part as I continually withdraw from his amazing grace and mercy on my health, life, and strength – day, after day, after day.

Isaiah 53:5 (NKJV)

But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed.

Nurse-maid Mama

While praying over my sleeping children last night, I practically begged God to let my youngest sleep through the night. He complained about an ear ache right before going to bed. I was so tired and didn't want another sleepless night due to family aches and pains. Yes, it sounds somewhat selfish, yet it's how I felt. Right after Christmas, my husband had a virus and reverted to a six year old while I played nurse. My youngest woke up last week wheezing and we spent the day in the emergency room while he received breathing treatments and now an earache! Lord, have mercy! In the midst of this, I felt like I was coming down with something myself, so knowing I didn't have time to be sick, I aggressively tackled my symptoms to prevent them from tackling me and thank God I'm okay - for now. I pray my family doesn't kill me as I go from sick bed to sick bed nursing them back to wellness. Going through this sure makes me thankful for my family's good health. On another hand, I just want to be sick myself and be able to rest in bed for about a week and let someone play nurse for me! Oh yea, God answered my prayer and my baby boy slept through the night. I got the rest I needed to make a possible trip to see the doctor today for an earache and don my nurse hat once again. My, my, my....the joy of playing nurse-maid!

Happy New Day!

Well, the holidays are behind us, yet the new year is before us. Happy New Day! Today is full of new opportunities and ways to be used by God. If you've made resolutions, I encourage you to pray for discipline to keep them. If not, make a new day resolution to live this day to the fullest degree. Let's glorify God in all we say and do. Our attitudes, emotions, thoughts, and actions will be tested today, yet staying plugged into the Power Source gives us the victory! Let's remember who we are and whose we are. Stay Christ-controlled and allow God to have His way in and through you this day and everyday! Happy New Day!

Live a Little!

I enjoy shopping as much as I enjoy yearly mammograms, so all my shopping trips are completely out of necessity. My maturing twelve year old watched me closely yesterday as I continually picked up items and placed them back on the shelf. He said to me with frustration in his voice, “Mama, live a little!” I laughed, yet his words spoke volumes to me. As I continued walking through the aisles, I reflected on my life in 2007, which was the year of no fear for me. Fear is what keeps me from being all I am created to be. Whether it’s fear of failure, rejection, being talked about, or fear of the unknown – fear keeps me from living to my fullest potential. I didn’t recognize many of my abilities until I acknowledged my fear. I prayed to be bold enough to allow God to have His way in every area of my life. God’s power and creativity runs through each of our veins, yet when we allow fear to reign, our life suffocates beneath the surface of our flesh. I challenge you to unleash God’s power and creativity in 2008 and live a little! Is there some place you’ve always wanted to go or something you’ve always wanted to do? Is there something you've started that you need to finish? If fear is keeping you from moving forward, step over it in the name of Jesus and follow the Holy Spirit without hesitation. You’ll be surprised of where it leads you! This year, I will continue recognizing fear in my life and stepping out on faith to allow God to do what He does best in me and through me. Watching my life unfold before my eyes is amazing as God increases and fear decreases. Come on, ladies…it’s a new day and a new year, so let’s live a little!

Psalm 34:4 (NKJV)
I sought the Lord, and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.