Holiday Hype

Steps for keeping our peace of mind during the Holiday Hype will begin November 1st.

I'm A Survivor

It amazes me how women still think I have it altogether after sharing my struggles and trials week after week. I am far from being at home praising the Lord all day and never losing control. Before the Lord allows me to share any meditation, I am tested and tried, and then after I share with you and boldly quote scripture, I am tested and tried again. I reflect on past meditations and I still struggle with my character, raising my children, accepting others, keeping my home clean, busyness, taking time for myself, maintaining my temple (I have my first mammogram today), and my marriage. After last week’s meditation on husbands, the enemy got busy! I could only laugh as I recalled the countless emails I received from women who are battling to save their marriage. Of course I still have struggles in my marriage! Please, don’t think you’re alone.

Through all my tests and trials, my faith in God is strengthened, my character is refined, and my witness is stronger. Yes, I get weary; yet standing on God’s promises gives me strength to endure. The battles will continue to come as long as I strive to be a Godly wife and mother, yet The Lord promised He would not put more on me than I can bear – sometimes I wonder, yet I’m still standing! Battles come one after another, yet He allows me to catch my breath and gird up for the next bout. He knows exactly what trials I need in my life to be the woman He created me to be - all things really do work for our good. I am a work in progress. I guess appearing to have it altogether is a witness in itself – no matter what comes my way, I am a survivor by the grace of God. The only way the enemy can win is if I give up and I’m in this race until the end. Do I have it altogether? No, but God keeps me together – He holds me up and through Him…I have the victory!

II Corinthians 4:8-9 (KJV)
“We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed…”

Holiday Hype

It's not even November yet and I already feel the hustle from the Holiday season. Good grief! Since I feel this pre-season pressure, I'll have to acknowledge it and do something to prevent it. I'm going to start slowing down right now. I refuse to get caught up in the hype of the holidays - it just doesn't make sense. Christmas, Thanksgiving, and New Years Eve/Day and all that comes with the season should definitely be a joyous time in our life with family and friends, yet we often lose focus on the reason for the celebration and get busy doing STUFF that isn't really necessary. This season I'll KEEP my peace of mind and be stress free. Stay tuned for a series on the Holiday Hype and how to keep your peace!

I Understand

I've received several comments from the blog titled What About Me, which was also a Monday Meditation for MOMSWEB. I appreciate all the comments I received in my personal email and also via the blog.
Marriage is a touchy subject among women and we won't always agree. We all experience some form of hurt or pain in our marriage - a perfect marriage doesn't exist. Please don't allow anyone to tell you whether to stay or leave your marriage. YOU are the one that has to sleep with your man. YOU are the one that has to see his face everyday. YOU are the one that may be frustrated and sick and tired of being sick and tired. YOU are the one that has to live with your decision. I've been there. As for me, I chose to stay. God gave me the endurance to stay when I truly wanted to walk away. I've had sleepless nights, made myself sick from stress, cried, and questioned God - why do you have me here? Is this really my husband? Why am I going through this? How much longer must I deal with him? I can only speak of what I know and God has shared his mercy on my marriage. God has blessed me and brought my marriage to a place I never thought was possible. It is hard to believe, yet I serve a God who has ALL POWER. I serve a God who has blessed me with PERFECT PEACE after pure hell in my marriage. The choice is yours! May God bless you and also give you perfect peace in your marriage.

A Wife's Prayer

Heavenly Father,

Help me to love my husband the way you love him. Help me to see him through your eyes. Help me to show him the same patience, long-suffering, and compassion you continually show me. I love him and I want to be the wife he needs in his life. Have mercy on me as I strive to do the right thing. Help me to be the wife you called me to be and not the wife I think I should be. Have your way, Lord. Have your way with my marriage and allow me to glorify you in all I do. Amen.

What About Me?

All men have an issue - alcohol, drugs, pornography, wondering eyes, rubber necks, sloppiness, lack of table manners, foul language, egotistical attitude, workaholic, or just plain lazy - pick one. A perfect man doesn’t exist. Learning to love everything about my husband that irritates me is drawing me closer to the Lord. I know in order to love Kevin with the love of Jesus, I need to be completely consumed by the Holy Spirit - only Jesus knows real love. Letting go and letting God is real to me. Once I allowed Jesus to deal with Kevin’s issues, my job as his wife became easier. I was no longer the self-appointed judge pointing out his faults. The more Christ-like I am towards my husband, the more Christ reveals Himself in our marriage.

Most women want to marry a man who has it all together. Oftentimes, the Lord will use a woman to help these hidden diamonds through their rough stages. We are the buffer to help them shine. Just as Jesus accepted us as we were and gave us unconditional, long-suffering love, we must also learn to love our man. For the single women wondering if Mr. Right is out there, you may be the kiss of life a confused frog is waiting for. We are helpmates – help him!

Sunday morning my husband told me to rest and that he would cook breakfast for the family. I wondered if he was setting me up for something, yet I accepted the invitation with pleasure. Kevin has been more attentive to my needs lately and it’s because one factor has changed – me. The more I humble myself and put his needs first without having a ‘what about me’ attitude, the more considerate he is of my needs. I’m a witness; endurance pays off. I contemplated leaving my marriage many times…thank God for Jesus because I would have missed seeing my diamond shine. Watching the process is a blessing in itself! Keep praying for your husband and ask God to show you the changes needed in you first and watch what happens! God rewards faithfulness.

Galatians 6:9 (NKJV)
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

Control Your Day!

It's another day and another week full of responsibilities, tasks, errands to run, people to see, and places to go. Looking at the big picture and the list of things to do can be overwhelming. Do what is necessary and enjoy the day. Grasp each moment! Begin your day with a Christ-controlled attitude. Being a member of the GMC Club only makes matters worse. What’s the GMC Club? It’s the club of Grumblers, Mumblers, and Complainers. We know certain things MUST be done, so we might as well learn to enjoy them. Control your day; don’t let your day control you!

Super Hero

Super Hero Movies have never been able to capture my attention, yet yesterday I watched Spider Man II with my youngest son and his friend. Although Spider Man had amazing spider-like abilities, he had two people in his life to encourage, edify, and empower him to believe in himself. It is no coincidence these two people were women. My husband joined me for the later part of the movie and as Spider Man’s friend confirmed her love and commitment to him, Spider Man appeared to make even greater leaps from building to building. My husband commented on the power and influence women have over men. It’s funny how men recognize the power women possess, yet we have to be reminded of the power within us. Spider Man has nothing on us! We have the Spirit of God! We have the power to influence young minds, change the atmosphere in our homes, and empower our husbands to be all they were created to be. We have the power to lead others to Christ and to make a difference in the lives of many. Mothers truly hold the supernatural power to change the Nation! Even the enemy knows the power we possess, which is why we are constantly under attack – Satan will try everything to strip us of our power. At one point in the movie, Spider Man felt defeated, yet he was empowered by encouraging words. When we feel exhausted, overwhelmed, and defeated, we can reconnect to our power source. The key is to never become disconnected! Continually feeding our hearts and minds with God’s Word fuels us with the supernatural power we need to be mentoring moms, supportive helpmates, and influential women of God. We have the power to work in the name of Jesus!

Acts 1:8 (NKJV)
“But you shall receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you…”

Dust Bunnies

Instead of looking for a seat at the 8 a. m. worship service, I was looking for a parking spot at Walmart at 6 a.m. to purchase cleaning supplies. The Lord told me He did not want one word of praise or one act of worship until I got my house in order, therefore, my family went to church and I stayed home to clean - I received a personal lesson on my lifestyle of worship. I’ll spare you the details and myself some embarrassment, yet the dust bunnies were setting up house. I’ve been out of town the past two weekends and my home has been neglected. Good excuse huh? If you were to come into my home, you definitely would not see a mess - I always make sure the entrance is presentable, however, if you were to take a walk down the hallway and look to the left or to the right, you’d see something a little different. After I thought about it, how could I get dressed to attend worship service and leave my house a mess? Actually it’s quite easy…it would simply be another game of charades and appearing to have it all together. I’ve done it before and felt absolutely no guilt, yet I thank God for getting my attention and correcting me. My home should be a reflection of a Godly Woman. No, it won’t always be spotless, yet should represent the family of God - not the family of slobs. The woman sets the tone in the house, so there will be some changes in my home and the changes will begin with me. What standards am I setting for my children? What standards am I setting for other mothers? What standards do I have for myself? This is another area of my life needing correction and I will obey. Dust bunnies don’t travel alone and neither does sin. Every area of my life, small and large, influences my entire witness.

I Corinthians 5:6 (NKJV)
Your glorying is not good. Do you not know that a little leaven (like yeast) leavens the whole lump?

Can't Sleep

Having trouble sleeping at night? I use to wake up in the early hours and wonder why the Lord had me up at 3 o'clock in the morning? I've gotten myself into the habit of waking up to pray. Whether we choose to believe it's nerves, hormones, or something we ate - waking up in the wee hours of the morning is a good time to pray! Our lives are so full of LIFE, that God has to compete with noise, people in our ear, worry, people in our ear, errands, housework, people in our ear, appointments, television, radio, people in our ear, etc... When does God get our undivided attention? When I'm awaken in the middle of the night, I believe God is ushering me to his throne. I may not understand what is going on that needs prayer, yet that's okay. I go into my children's room to pray for them, I pray for my husband and our marriage, I pray for covering of my home, I pray for protection, wisdom in raising my children, compassion to love my husband when he's not lovable, to be more Christ-Controlled, and whatever else the Lord brings to mind. I also pray for individuals outside of my family that come to mind. After I pray, I praise God for my many, many blessing and the storm I may be going through or about to go through. You know, praise runs the enemy away! After this time of prayer and praise, I go back to bed and I sleep like a baby. I've been doing this for a few years now and it's been a blessing to me and my family benefits! Pray without ceasing!

Invisible Mother

Mothers can easily be invisible around the home. So often, the things we do go unnoticed until something is out of place or left un-done. How did those clothes get washed? Where did that dinner come from? The bathroom sure is sparkling! Not being acknowledged can leave feelings of discouragement or frustration. Do you remember when you began to fully appreciate your mother? Probably in your older years or even when you left the house and had children of your own. We have to remind ourselves who we are working for and where the true appreciation comes from. It comes from our boss - Jesus Christ. Not only is He the one to reward us, yet He is the only one to judge us on our performance. Jesus will give us the comfort and care we desire in this demanding role of motherhood - the role He created! The next time you feel invisible, remember Jesus sees everything you do. EVERYTHING!

Get Away From Me

Yesterday I couldn’t find a minute to myself. Every time I prepared to sit and exhale, the phone would ring, the dryer timer would buzz, or my children were calling my name. By evening time, I was desperate for a minute and I refused to go to the bathroom to get it (smile). I knew the minute was somewhere hiding in one of the many rooms in my home. I had schooled, cleaned, chauffeured, and played. I was pooped and wanted to be alone. My need for that one-minute becomes more crucial when that special time of the month is approaching. After the boys had bathed and said goodnight, I got on the floor to do some exercising. I exhaled as I enjoyed the peace of mind although my husband was in the room watching television. I knew he wouldn’t disturb me, so I was safe. Within five seconds my oldest comes into the room and drops on the floor next to me. Yes, he had already said goodnight, so what was he doing up? My children have radar and I honestly believe they think my ‘me' time is a personal threat to them. Maybe my ‘me’ time is an actual person to them and they think they have to compete with it. Maybe they think ‘me’ time will take their time. Before I knew it, I snapped at my son and said, “Get away from me!” He quietly walked away because he knew Mama reached her limit and nothing else needed to be said. All I wanted was a minute and yes, I found my minute!! I felt like a different person and I know the exercise helped to change my feeling of irritability also. I use to feel guilty for that one minute, yet I’ve realized my ‘me’ time isn’t for me after all, but for the well being of my family! Mama needs her minute!

No Coincidence

Once again, I began an exercise regime that seems to be working for me. I'm so tired of starting off strong with good intentions only to stop after a week or two. The Lord is making sure I stick to it this time. I was recently asked to facilitate an Integrity Class at my church and my first lesson was on commitment. As I led the class in making a list of items we were most and least committed to, the Holy Spirit began to work. Exercise topped my list of things least committed to and as I shared my list with the class, others agreed. While expressing the importance of being committed to caring for our temple, I had a defining moment on being an example for the Lord and practicing what I preach. My younger sister told me no woman over a size 12 wants to hear me talk about diet and exercise because of my small frame, yet I am not excused from glorifying God in this area of my life. I received a call from a friend this morning reminding me of October being Breast Cancer Awareness Month and how we need to do our part to prevent illness and disease in order to be around for our husbands and children. This phone call was no coincidence. Another friend sends me email reminders on the importance of mammograms - this is no coincidence. My father faithfully walks eight to ten miles every day regardless of the weather - this is no coincidence. I have several friends who are Cancer Survivors or are now being treated for cancer - this is no coincidence. The Lord choosing me to facilitate the class on Integrity to get my attention on commitment is no coincidence. Yes, the signs are there. How many chances will the Lord give me? He’s given me several and I thank God for His mercy. I know the awesome benefits of exercise and proper nutrition and I also know the Holy Spirit cannot reign in an unkempt temple - my temple is a little raggedy. I must be an example across the board as a Godly Woman - not just in a few areas of my life. I must be an example for my children and also be in a position to teach the younger women in my life. Will you join me as I make a commitment to be a faithful servant in regards to caring for my body - His temple? If you're already there, God bless you! Please encourage another woman to do the same!

1 Corinthians 6:19 (NIV)
Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own;