A message from Firstborn

Uh...what are you trying to say? 

I recieved this video in my Facebook message box, from Firstborn.  I didn't know whether to laugh or figure out if there was a the hidden message behind the video. I must admit, it did make me shake my head and smile. Thanks, Firstborn...I think (smile).

Bookmark and Share

GMC Club for Mothers

While waiting for Secondborn’s basketball game this weekend, I had to endure the game before his, which I was completely uninterested in, yet received a Life Lesson while watching. The team was short one player, so to make a complete team of five, the daughter of the coach had to play. The little girl said several times that she didn’t want to play, but had no choice. She put her uniform on and ran onto the court. She looked over at the bench where her coach was and yelled, “I don’t know what to do!” I laughed out loud, and couldn’t believe she had a smile on her face! The entire game, she smiled as she ran up and down the court purposely avoiding the ball. She was going with the flow and although her team lost, she was such a joy to watch!

I told her she was my hero because she did something she didn’t want to do with a joyful spirit and a beautiful smile. Wow. This little girl offered my Life Lesson for LaVender. I would have complained the whole time – with a frown. LOL!

Needless to say, after a fun-filled weekend of family fun, Monday morning is here with work to be done - work I really don't want to do.

How about you? Did you even feel like getting out of bed, going to work, or getting your children ready for school? Did you have a joyful heart or proudly show your membership card for the GMC Club (grumblers, mumblers, and complainers)? I can't get that little girl's smile out of my mind, so today I choose to be joyful!

To read more about complaining, I invite you to visit Faith, Love, Kids, and Me to read what Amber has to say about mothers that complain.

Philippians 2:14 (NIV)
Do everything without complaining or arguing

Bookmark and Share

"We Snap in Silence" Excerpt

"We Snap in Silence - Unveiling Private Pain and Finding Perfect Peace as a Woman, Wife, and Mother"

Load III -- A Mother

Don't stop reading because you haven't given birth. If you have ever poured any part of yourself into a child's life you have mothered. If you desire to be a mother, know a mother, or if you have a mother, this load is for you also. What will it take to understand the true value of a mother? What will it take before mothers are appreciated for their true worth? Until a mother learns to appreciate herself, understand her value in the home, and learns that taking care of herself first makes her a better person, no one else can be expected to understand or appreciate our God-given value. It takes a mother to understand a mother. We will soon learn to stop seeking appreciation, affirmation, and kudos from those who don't understand what we go through.

Our family sees what we do, yet at the same time and through those same eyes, they don't see what we do. They just don't get it! They don't think we get sick, tired, or sick and tired! Do you think they would keep expecting us to give if they really understood how we felt? I choose to believe my family is not that insensitive. I have accepted the fact they aren't able to fully comprehend my role and responsibilities. My goodness! I'm just beginning to understand my role and responsibilities, and I've been a mother for twelve-plus years.

To read more, order your copy of We Snap in Silence here.

The perfect gift for Mother's Day!

Bookmark and Share

Bad Economy = Bad Marriage

No, I do not believe a bad economy equals a bad marriage, however, I believe it can cause more problems in an already troubled marriage.

Times may not be difficult in your marriage, but sooo many marriages are struggling as a result of the economy.  Many mothers already working outside the home are having to work overtime or even look for a second part-time job. Mothers working in the home are having to go back to work or find creative ways to bring in a little money to help out.

One mother shared with me that she felt guilty being at home all day while her husband busted his butt working to make ends meet.  I'm not about to tell anyone what to do, but if going back to work or seeking employment is not an option for you, do all you can to help the working spouse out. 
  • Send him off to work with a full stomach and as happy as you can.
  • Greet him when he returns home with a smile and a hot cooked meal.
  • Keep the homefront clean and allow him to relax and unwind when he comes home.
  • Try not to nag about not having enough money - it'll only make matters worse.
  • Cut corners and save money by using coupons and looking for sales.
  • Cook low cost, tasty meals.
  • Stop spending money you don't have
  • Perform plastic surgery on credit cards - cut them up!
  • Encourage your husband - especially if he's doing the best he can
If you both are working, recognize the financial storm and go through it together. Make extra efforts to work together on finances and don't pass blame! Everyone is feeling the economic crunch in some form or fashion, so remember you are not alone!

I'm sure you have some helpful tips of your own. Feel free to share!

Bookmark and Share

Take Care Of Your Business!

I attended a woman's retreat over the weekend and didn't touch a computer all weekend. Actually, it felt good not to work, cook, homeschool, clean, and everything else I do everyday. I was able to come home feeling renewed, refreshed, and revived! I had been complaining about needing a getaway retreat and even though I spoke at this one, I was given a shot of much needed rejuvenation.

When I returned home, Hubby was outside playing basketball with Firstborn. He smiled and jumped like a little child when he saw me. I didn't have to ask if he missed me; it showed. He helped me with my bags, we sat and talked about our weekend, and then it happened...I sat at the computer to catch up on work.

Immediately, I was reminded of some of the things I shared with the women at the retreat. One was about taking care of business in the bedroom. Wow. Here I was after being away from hubby all weekend and I was catching up on work instead of catching up on us. Hubby will be okay; he understands. These were just a few thoughts I had as I battled getting up from the computer and going to bed with my husband who was already there. An understanding spouse can be taken for granted before you know it, so I jumped up from the computer and went to bed. Hubby was already snoring, but instead of touching the keys on the keyboard, I was touching my husband. I was taking care of business.

I thank God for the retreat and although I take many mental retreats due to not always being able to get away from the home front, I was inspired by this awesome group of women who have a retreat every year! This was their twelfth year having a retreat and it was awesome. All women should be given the opportunity to retreat in order to be renewed, so I've decided to begin something similar with Momsweb; stay tuned! Maybe if we retreated more, we won't hesitate to take care of our business in the bedroom.

Proverbs 31:11 (NIV)

Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value

Bookmark and Share

The Tracks of My Teen

The teenage years haven’t been easy for me, but at least I’ve learned to go with the flow – until recently. This month, Firstborn asked me about tattoos, smoking cigarettes, and radical haircuts. It was only by God’s grace was I able to maintain my composure and not freak out. Jesus, help me!

I’m so grateful that he felt comfortable enough to talk to me, but has he lost his mind? Where is my teaching and character training? Jesus, are you there?

The Lord assured me he had not left me, but also let me know there is nothing I can do to alter the plans He has for Firstborn’s life. Firstborn will make some wrong choices. He will do some things against his training and yes, he will lose his mind for a while, but he’ll be back. Lord, you promise?

Being a stressed out, maniac mother of a teen for the next few years is not in my plans, so I reminded myself that Firstborn’s tracks were his rite of passage as a teenager. Gird up, Mama!

Firstborn’s desire to try me, rebel, and continually sleep does not agree with this mama, but it’s part of his transition. His sweet spirit is still present although often suffocated by …teenage stuff. His stuff is being used to get rid of some of my stuff that has been surfacing during this tough transition. Once again, the way God uses Motherhood to prune me amazes me. Nobody, but Jesus!

Tattoos, cigarettes, and radical haircuts….sigh….I pray they were just questions and not the actual tracks of my teen. Either way, I choose peace in his rite of passage and peace only comes through prayer.

I Thessalonians 5:17 (NKJV)
Pray without ceasing

Bookmark and Share

Shut Up!

For those mothers with talking toddlers that seem like they just won't stop talking, let them talk and enjoy it because when they become teenagers, you'll be praying they talk to you about matters of their heart.

I'm learning to not talk so much to Firstborn and just listen - I hear and learn more. Allowing him to initiate conversations is difficult for me, but when I wait, he opens up - in his time.

When I pick him up from school, it's so hard not to attack him with questions, but waiting shows me he'll eventually come around and tell me about his day - Thank God!

When I drop him off at school, he usually has his ear phones listening to his MP3. It use to irritate me greatly that he would tune me out, but I've learned he is preparing his mind for his day - his way.  My voice is probably the last voice he wants to hear.

Don't get me wrong, I still parent (sometimes over-parent), but I'm learning when to talk and to talk to my sons - not talk AT them all the time.

Just this morning, I had to wake him early to wash dishes he didn't wash last night and I wanted to lecture (at 6 am), but I silently told myself to SHUT UP! Why did I feel I needed to say anything at all? He knew he was wrong when we went to bed last night!

Yip, yap, yip, yap...teenagers don't want to hear nothing like that! SHUT UP!

Bookmark and Share

Don't Show Me, Tell Me!

This morning I awoke full of joy as I remembered a song I heard yesterday titled, Thank you, Jesus! I began praising God and thanking Him for His blood because His loss of blood resulted in the loss of His life, which gave me life.

In the midst of my praise, the Holy Spirit nudged me about something I tell my two sons all the time. The boys are wonderful about thanking me for cooking their meals, transporting them, and whatever else a mother is supposed to do. I remind them that actions speak louder than words. I’d love to see just how thankful they are by showing a little more initiative around the house.

The Lord told me the same thing I tell the boys - don’t just tell me, show me! Show me by having a joyful attitude and through obedience to my Word. Show me by preparing dinner without grumbling. Show me by loving your husband regardless of his actions. Show me by showing yourself friendly. Good grief, Lord…I’m trying to praise you and you offer a Life Lesson for LaVender.

I truly am thankful for the blood of Jesus because without the blood, I wouldn’t have my health, strength, or the energy and power to do all I do as a woman, wife, and mother. My thankfulness needs to show more action – just as I tell the boys.

Being a mother seems to be God’s way of pruning and grooming me as a woman of God. Every lesson I give the boys turns out to be a life lesson for me and although I thank God daily for His blood, I’m reminded that actions speak louder than words.

1 John 1:7 (NKJV)
But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin.

Bookmark and Share

Do Mothers Sacrifice?

I try to encourage new mothers to get their education, careers, and personal goals out of the way before they start a family because the wants and needs of the family will place hers on the back burner - for a while.

Yes, there are plenty of moms going to school and enjoying thriving careers, yet it places a strain on her and the family. Balance? I don't think so. Juggling? Definitely, and trying not to allow any of the balls fall to the ground.

Sacrifice, obligation, duty, labor of love, or a combination of them all?

Just as Jesus gave his life, a mother lays down her life to put the needs of her family first. And just as we take advantage of His love, we too are sometimes taken advantage of, yet we continue to love.

I tell myself that when both boys are out of the house and gone, then it's my turn. Even as a new author, the marketing of the book is not a priority - if it were, I wouldn't be sitting at home blogging, but I'd be on the road on a book tour. Hubby always says I'd be a multi-millionaire if I didn't have a family. Hmmm....

This Resurrection Day as we consider the amazing, mind-blowing sacrifice of our Lord, let us also remember that as a mother, we are called to sacrifice also - we sacrifice our personal wants, needs, and desires for God's children. What a privilege and honor to be a vessel used by God!

Happy Resurrection Day!

Bookmark and Share