I Don't Have Time!

There are 24 hours in a day and we all have the same amount of time to tackle the tasks of the day. What do you do with your time? Do you have enough time? I’ll share a nugget my wise father shared with me. Time is something you can’t find when you lose it...when it’s gone, it’s gone for good. I remember a mother who would relax on her front porch and patiently wait for her children to get off the school bus. Her house was always spotless clean, even her children’s rooms. She would be awarded Yard of the Month several times in the year, and dinner was always ready for her husband and even lunch when he can home. She was always able to enjoy an occasional girls night out, sometimes in the middle of the week! How did she do it? Was she a Stepford Wife or something? I can’t seem to get ahead to get my house clean the way I want it, forget KEEP it clean! Yes, dinner is usually almost ready when hubby comes home, yet if he came home for lunch, I’d probably scream because he interrupted my day. Sit on the porch and wait for my children? I pick them up from school and I’m usually rushing out the house hoping I won’t be late and they only go one day a week. My sons’ room is always junky in spite of my obviously ineffective commands to have them clean it several times a day. Yard of the Month? Yeah right;I don’t do yard work; I don’t have time! Where does the time go? Am I suffering from time management failure? Another mom I know has a daily schedule and she lives by it, another one has a To Do List that works for her. Me? Hmmm...I just take the day as it comes minute by minute. Do whatever works for you and your family, just remember we all have 24 hours in the day and we really do have enough time in the day, it’s what we do with our time that matters.

I'm Not Complaining

Many mothers choose to keep their struggles and tribulations to themselves…bottled up inside and never voicing a word of what they deal with on a daily basis. This is fine if this works for you, yet others choose to share their days with a close friend or another mother who is not so eager to judge. You may call this complaining, yet it’s a stress relief for many mothers. Just being able to vent about your day, a situation with your children, or an unlovable moment with your husband, is medicine for many moms. If you don’t have anyone to share with, be careful not to disclose your life with just anyone out of desperation. Pray for someone in your life that will have a mutual understanding of an occasional need for a listening ear and confidentiality. Pray for someone who will be willing to invest in the quality of your life and your family. This is priceless! You may not always need a solution, just an understanding ear will be appreciated. Once again, let’s not judge each other on how we choose to deal with our joys and challenges of motherhood! Encourage, edify, and uplift your fellow mother!

The Weight of the World

It never fails, whenever the family leaves the house, I’m usually the last one out. My three gentlemen are in the car wondering what is taking me so long. I often wonder why I’m the last one out also! I’m usually cutting off lights, ceiling fans, and making sure the doors are locked. Sometimes I’m trying to finish just one more task, so I won’t have to look at unfinished business when I get home. I just have to fold that last towel, wash a few more dishes or pick up shoes sitting in the hallway. Tonight my husband reminded me to make sure I always have the cell phone when WE leave the house. Okay, I can do that! I don’t understand why it has to be ME, yet I’m flattered and fortunate to have to remember these small, yet important matters for the entire family. Yeah right! It would be nice if we could work as a team. Teamwork! Teamwork! RAH! RAH! RAH! My oldest said he had a way to help me. Could this be true? Is he actually trying to help lighten my load? He said he would put a sign on the door that said CELL PHONE, so I could remember to pick it up when we leave the house. I give up...rah,rah,rah. Thank God my shoulders were made wide enough to carry the weight, yet they sure get tired sometimes!

De-Clutter My Brain

I was looking for a roll of tape this morning and each room I went into had a pile of junk either in a corner on a box, a table, a desk or the ironing board, which is in my bedroom waiting to be taken down. It’s now topped with clothes, which is an additional job I’ve created for myself. I got agitated as I went from room to room and completely forgot about the tape, yet focused on the piles that seemed to laugh at me for being intimidated by them. I wish I could twinkle my nose and remove these little piles that are causing me big pain. I know my thought process will be a lot clearer once these piles are removed. Don’t you feel better in a clean, uncluttered space? Our surroundings play a big part in our thoughts and even our emotions. A dirty house can be overwhelming to the point you don't feel like doing anything! It’s just one thing to do...tackle each pile one by one...SIGH. This could have been avoided if everyone picked up behind themselves. I’ve already removed one pile in my bedroom and my husband will be stunned once he notices it’s finally gone. I feel better about it myself and have motivation to tackle one more, but just ONE more. Maybe then, I'll find the tape!

My Gift To You

Mother’s Day is quickly approaching and wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could give the gift of acceptance to each other? This weekend I met a mother of six children, and for whatever reason she shared this information with me; she has never been married. She immediately asked me not to hold this fact against her because so many mothers do. My reaction and words to this mother could have empowered her or broken her spirit. I thought of an Old Ethiopian Proverb MW has adopted…”When spider webs unite they can tie up a lion.” My personal proverb is, “When mothers come together, we can change the world.” When we realize the collective power and influence God has planted in us as women, we can accomplish so much through our children, our husbands, our communities, our cities, etc... We can accept, encourage, and pray for one another or choose to judge and condemn (verbally or in our thoughts). Let's travel this demanding, yet gratifying journey of motherhood together. I invite you to read a word of encouragement from one of MW’s seasoned mothers at http://www.momsweb.net/v.cfm titled Accepting One Another. This is my Mother's Day gift to you and I encourage you to share this gift with another mother. Remember, "When spider webs unite, they can tie up a lion."

Be Thankful

I was sharing with another mother how I thought my Mondays would be a time for me to do some things I wanted to do. Since the boys are in school on Mondays only, I was hoping that would be a time to renew my mind and kick my feet up. It never turns out that way and I find myself running errands and doing things around the house and before you know it, the time is gone and it's time to pick the boys up from school! She mentioned how she would love to just be home alone regardless of what she had to do. She's right! Some mothers would just love to be home to clean up without being disturbed or even to use the bathroom or eat a meal without interruption. My goodness, give me an inch and I want a mile! Yes, I'm thankful just to be home alone one day a week for a few hours. It really does make a difference!

We Should Get Paid

Yesterday morning, my eight year old was being a busy bee and completing his chores. He’s always excited about viewing his list of chores each morning. I guess this is an age eight benefit because my ten year old finds no joy in his list of things to do. Well, as he removed the sofa cushions to vacuum the overflowing dust bunnies and find leftover popcorn, lost pencils, and pennies, he says to me, “Mama, we should get paid for the work we do because we do more than you.” At that moment I felt guilty as I sat on my butt typing and looking at him with the vacuum in his hand...the guilt lasted an incredibly brief moment. I forgot I was an adult speaking to a child and quickly went down the list of things I do with a frown on my face. “Do I get paid for cooking your breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Do I get paid for washing your nasty underwear? Do I get paid for anything I do around here?” I quickly snapped back into an adult/child dialogue and lowered my tone and my blood pressure and kindly said, “Sweetie, don’t ask to be rewarded for things you do. We all live here and have to help keep the house clean. God sees you and he will bless you.” I went back to my typing, yet in my mind, I continued to add to the list of things I do without pay and was dumbfounded by his audacity to make such a crazy comment. He was only verbally expressing what I sometimes think. I guess I should take a dose of my own medicine huh?

Happy Helpmates

I often think of the term HELPMATE. Hmmm...God made woman to be man’s helpmate and I refuse to believe this help is all about cooking my husband’s meals and washing his clothes. Yes, he needs help in those areas also, yet I’m reminded just how important offering encouraging words, uplifting my husband’s spirit, and helping him to realize his potential is help also. I stay home while my husband goes out in the work force. Although my job is just as important in the home, he is the official breadwinner. It’s on his shoulders to provide for the family and keep a roof over our heads and food on the table. Sending him off in love and allowing him to return to a peaceful home, helps him in ways I’ll never fully understand. When we were both working outside the home, my famous phrase was, “I work too!” I wasn’t overly concerned with helping him because I could barely help myself! My words can sometimes cut into the deepest wound and when I realized I was killing my husband’s spirit with the ugly things that come out of my mouth, I was no longer a help to him, yet a hindrance to his strength and growth as a man. God specifically placed me in his life to help him, so when he does something that irritates or frustrates me, I must remember my words can either build him up or tear him down. It’s all about humility. Can I put my needs aside long enough to see and meet the needs of my husband? I ensure my children’s needs are met without missing a beat! Today, I will begin AGAIN, to do my best to be a happy helpmate.